


Of Crepes, Clue, and Coffee

by Lokne



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M, First Dates, Fluff, Snarky Darcy Lewis, Snarky Tony Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-26 16:17:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23373379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lokne/pseuds/Lokne
Summary: Darcy Lewis cranked up the music on her iPod and danced around her kitchen.
Relationships: Tony Stark/Darcy Lewis
Comments: 6
Kudos: 113





	Of Crepes, Clue, and Coffee

**Author's Note:**

> A repost of an old fic of mine.

Darcy Lewis cranked up the music on her iPod and danced around her kitchen. She swayed her hips as the bass rocked in her ears. She spun around and smiled as she almost slipped on the floor. She loved sliding on the hardwood and tile floors in her pent house suite. Darcy mouthed the words. She didn’t care when she started singing off key. It was all about the emotion anyway. 

She shrieked when something cold poked her shoulder. Darcy whirled around and grabbed the counter, knocking her cup of coffee off. She scowled when the delicious nectar spilled. She didn’t care about the coffee mug. It had been a gift from her mom. Elizabeth Lewis had terrible taste in mugs, clothes, and everything. So yeah. Not important.

“What the heck, man?” She jabbed her finger at the familiar machinery that was looking at her. It had a camera for an eye. “That was rude.” She didn’t know how Dum-E got out of the lab, but he was an AI. His IQ was higher than Jane’s heart rate while macking face with Thor.

Darcy almost smiled when his head drooped. She patted the claw and tried to decide what to do next. He didn’t speak. Not like JARVIS at least. “Did you get lost?” Could he get lost? He had to know the entire layout of the building. Darcy scowled. “Did Tony send you? I already told him today was my day off. He agreed. All that science was hurting my brain. Seriously. Thought it would dribble out my ears.”

The claw latched onto her pajama shirt and tugged. She looked at her semi-clad form and debated whether she should follow him. She shrugged. Darcy had seen Tony in worse situations and if it had been important it would have called for pants.

Darcy followed the bot down to the basement where Stark was experimenting with a rare object that he found a few weeks earlier. He still didn’t know what it was made of and it only urged him on. Darcy waltzed through the lab door without announcing herself. She smiled when JARVIS lowered the blaring music. She hated AC/DC. The guitar rifts gave her a splitting headache.

“Is there a reason why I was kidnapped by a one-armed machine?” Darcy asked as she perched on a vacant stool. She barely glanced to make sure there weren’t suspicious substances on it. Darcy swung her socked feet and tapped a beat on the legs. 

Tony’s gaze jerked away from the equations shining before him. The blue holograms glowed behind him when he turned toward her. His eyes roamed over her bare legs and Rainbow Bright t-shirt. A smug grin highlighted his already handsome face. He cocked an eyebrow. “Are those mine?” He nodded at her boy shorts.

Darcy laughed. “Do you normally wear women’s panties?” She stood and turned so he could see them better.

“No.”

“Shame. I’m sure you’d look stunning,” Darcy teased. She rolled her eyes when his grin grew dirtier. She didn’t want to know. “Kidnapping. Me. Ring any bells?”

Tony stared blankly and then a spark lit his face. He groaned and rubbed his face as if he couldn’t believe what was happening. “Dum-E, what have I told you? You’re not allowed to leave the lab. No, I don’t care if you miss her. It doesn’t—” Tony blinked and glanced at her with a speculative eye. “You dance around in your underwear?”

“Uh, yeah. What else am I supposed to dance in?” Darcy asked. It was obvious that Stark needed to live a little. Actually more than a little. “Are you telling me that you’ve never busted a move worthy of youtube in your tighty whities—?”

“Boxers.”

“Boxers?” Darcy snorted of course he wore boxers. They were probably red silk, or gold satin. He was utterly ridiculous. 

Tony leaned on his knees and smirked. “Tighty whities? You think about my underwear a lot, Darcy?”

Darcy hummed. Nope. Not touching that one with a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole. Not going to happen. “Doesn’t everyone?” she flippantly threw out. “Are you afraid to break your back?” 

“Not during that kind of dancing.” Tony winked.

Darcy laughed and leaned on his desk when she almost fell over. “Your lines are terrible. How do they work?” She held up a hand when he opened his mouth. “You’re Tony Stark.” At his amused chuckle she grinned. “That’s like always saying your Batman.”

“Please. I am way better than Batman. One, he is a depressive loser. Two, I’m way more attractive. Three, I’m Tony Stark.”

Iron Man was way better than Batman, but she wouldn’t tell him that. His ego was already the size of JARVIS’s backup servers. If it grew any larger, it wouldn’t fit in an underground bunker—the one that she knew absolutely nothing about, of course.

“You gonna show me your moves? I’m sure you’re fantastic.” Tony prodded her. He stared at her legs when she crossed and uncrossed them again. 

Her lips bared teeth in a parody of a smile. He was so cocky. “I’d leave you breathless. I don’t know if you’d keep up.”

“Again with the old jokes. I’m hurt, Darcy. My heart is crying great weeping tears of sadness. I don’t know how I’ll ever recover.” 

Darcy smacked him on the shoulder, and if her hand happened to caress his bare skin for a moment, well, neither of them said anything. “I’m sure you could ask Dum-E to fetch you a tissue.”

Darcy glanced around the lab when she noticed that Dum-E vanished soon after she entered the room. The sound of his servos next to her made her jump. She glanced at the tall strawberry milkshake and beamed. “Good Boy.” Dum-E was her favorite AI after JARVIS.

Darcy swirled the spoon through the extra thick milkshake and took a bite. Yum! It was her favorite. She forgave the bot for spilling her precious coffee. “Only you would think that a milkshake is an acceptable breakfast food.”

“That’s not true! I also eat… coffee.” Tony held up an empty coffee cup as proof that he had remembered to eat. Disgust twisted his features when his thumb slipped on mold and a questionable liquid rimming the mug. “Uh, see?”

Darcy eyed the mug as if it was alive. “Uh huh. Should I call poison control?”

Tony licked his teeth and clicked his tongue. “Nah. Dum-E knows what to do should I start exhibiting signs of poisoning. Right, buddy?”

The bot answered Tony in a language that only Tony understood. Darcy just watched. She smiled around the spoon. It was adorable to see them together. Tony stole her spoon and grabbed a huge portion of her milkshake.

“No fair! Get your own.”

“My tower, my food.”

Darcy shifted on the stool when the cold metal became uncomfortable against her legs. All of the warmth was zapped out of them. She looked around for the blanket that she kept near his desk but couldn’t find it. She eyes narrowed when she saw the smoldering pile of plaid on her desk. 

“Oops?”

“Just get me another one. A better one,” she ordered. She was used to her things getting blown up or eaten by acid. That had been her fourth blanket. She was tired of running to the store, and she hated buying things online. It was too impersonal.

She hopped to her feet and shifted when the cold pierced her socks. The darned cold was everywhere. She missed her penthouse. Darcy ran an absent hand over Tony’s hair as she headed to the door. JARVIS could start a fire. Yeah, that sounded perfect. 

“See ya. Gotta go do stuff,” she called behind her.

Tony snorted. “Have fun dancing naked.”

Darcy dodged around a blushing Bruce entering Tony’s lab. She winked when she realized that he caught Tony’s goodbye. “Panties, Tony. It was panties.” Darcy bounced into the elevator and onto her floor. It felt great to have no plans. It was her first day off in weeks. 

First there had been a mutant Gerbil, the incident with the silly string and then the cheese. Yeah, all of the Avengers had agreed to just forget those. It would be impossible since most of their fights ended up on youtube by stupid people who filmed instead of running. And JARVIS found it hilarious. 

Darcy toyed with the earbuds around her neck and wondered if she wanted to get into real people clothes or just hang out all day. She looked outside and sighed. Nope. Getting dressed. It was sunny. Sun deserved being dressed and at least a trip to her favorite café for a cheese jalapeño bagel. 

Darcy took a fast shower, skipped her makeup routine and put on her favorite outfit that had seen way too many washes. The pants hugged her butt perfectly, and the shirt was softer than a box of kittens. She snagged her purse and sandals. 

The heat of the sun, hit her as soon as she exited Avenger Tower. She waved at the receptionist—Darcy never bothered to learn her name and immediately headed left. She dodged around the pedestrians and the dog on a leash. Darcy walked a few blocks and entered the café. She didn’t glance at the menu. She ate here twice a week when she could get away. They knew what she liked.

When she got to the counter she beamed at Lisa, the blonde cashier, and added soup and a sandwich to her standing order. When she paid Darcy took the last remaining table on the patio. She blew on the tomato basil soup. The smell was divine. And it was better than coffee or a milkshake. She dipped her grilled Swiss cheese sandwich in the soup, until it was gone. She sopped the dregs with bits of bagel. Darcy shrugged when she couldn’t find a napkin and licked her fingers. 

“So I was kicked out,” Tony announced as he dropped in the empty seat across from her. He flicked up his sunglasses to the top of his head and slumped in his chair. “Rude, am I right?”

Darcy noticed that he’d cleaned up. His hair was still damp. Either JARVIS or Pepper, then. “Ruder than getting kidnapped?” Darcy asked as she pushed the empty bowl away. She leaned back in her chair and allowed herself to take a deep breath. She didn’t bother asking how Tony knew where she was. He knew everything. Correction, JARVIS knew everything. 

“Are you still on that? It wasn’t my fault.” He held up his hands in surrender. “Dum-E missed you.”

“Riiight. Dum-E missed me.” Darcy still didn’t believe that line. She had heard hundred if not thousands of variations of that line for years. Dum-E broke the coffee maker. Dum-E overrode Fury’s access to the Tower. Dum-E blew up the lab. 

Tony glanced around as he tapped a rhythm on the table. “So this is… quaint. No, nice. This is nice. Sun, wind, little café. The sound of taxis and horns in the background.”

“The food is delicious. Far better than Shawarma.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Is that still a thing. This?” he gestured between them. “Because I thought we were over that. Done. No more talking about it.”

Darcy shook her head. “I don’t remember that, strangely enough. Must have just been a hallucination brought on by too much whiskey and not enough sleep.”

“Huh.” Tony read the little blackboard sign on the sidewalk. “Crepes. They sell crepes. Are they any good, or will I have to fly to Paris afterward?”

Darcy hated crepes. They were too thin, and sweet for her. Milkshakes were very sweet but it was different. They were supposed to be mushy. “They're mushy and gross. I don’t like them.”

“Uncultured baby.”

“Uncivilized geezer,” Darcy shot back. 

Tony stood up. “That’s it. I’m buying one. And taking a bite.” He ignored her protests and cut to the front of the line. She mentally groaned when he flashed his ‘I’m Tony Stark and I’m Charming’ smile. She hated it because it worked every time. The smell of whipped cream and berries flooded her senses as a crepe was shoved in her face. “Eat,” he ordered. 

Darcy was surprised that she didn’t make him eat it since she’d already eaten lunch. But she didn’t want him to complain for the next hour because she refused. Darcy reluctantly took a bite when he continued to stare at her. The explosion of fruit surprised her. He cackled. “Told ya.”

“Shut up.” The last time she ate one, she took a bite and spit it out. Her mom made them for her nineteenth birthday. She licked the cream off her lips and watched him eat the rest. 

“What were your plans for the day?” Tony asked, trailing his fork in the remains of drizzled chocolate sauce.

“Why do you assume I have plans?” Darcy asked. 

“You’re right. What was I thinking?” Tony pushed out his chair and gestured with his hand for her to follow.

Darcy ran a few steps until she caught up. She bumped their shoulders. A soft sigh escaped. She loved spending time outdoors. Many people didn’t believe her when she said she would rather go on a walk than to a movie, but it was the truth. After being inside all day, Darcy wanted to be outside. She didn’t get many chances to do that.

Darcy didn’t realize they were head to the park she normally walked on her lunch break until they arrived. She snuck a glance, once again surprised. “I’m surprised that you’re even out here. Thought you turned into a vampire.”

“Vampire? You couldn’t come up with something cooler? Wraith, or Troll.” At Darcy’s judging look, Tony shrugged. “Yeah. That one kinda got away from me.” He looked away. “So… how do you like working at the Tower? The other Avengers treating you okay?”

Tony was acting weird again, weirder than normal. “Is that your subtle way of asking if I want a raise, because I would be all over that?”

“You’re being paid a lab monkey wage, right? Yeah, you should totally get a raise. Been with us long enough to graduate to lab orangutan wage. They are more intelligent than monkeys.” Tony nodded. “JARVIS, make a note to up Darcy’s salary.”

“It has been noted, Sir,” JARVIS cool tone answered.

Darcy gaped. She’d been kidding. Not that getting a raise wouldn’t be awesome, but it had totally been a joke. She put up with a lot of crap working for Tony Stark, but she knew that he appreciated everything that she did. Darcy never doubted that Tony was grateful. 

“Thanks.” It felt insignificant, but it was all she could offer other than a snarky comeback, or her iPod. And she liked her iPod too much to part with it again. She’d barely gotten it back form Agent Coulson in one piece. 

Tony grimaced when a black limo pulled up beside them. When Happy stepped out of the driver’s door, Tony’ entire countenance seemed to dim. “Sorry, Sir, but you have a meeting in less than forty-five minutes.”

“Can’t you just tell Pepper that I forgot?” Tony whined. He rubbed his forehead as if he had a headache. 

Darcy knew Tony hated sitting in meetings. They were boring and his attention wandered. It also killed his creativity. Tony was in the middle of a project. He probably wouldn’t be able to finish it until next week.

Happy gave a commiserating smile. “Sorry. She threatened to release the hounds on me if I didn’t get you there on time.”

“Naw, it’s okay.” Tony looked from Darcy to the waiting limo. “I assume both suits are in the car.”

“Of course.”

“Great,” Tony’s response was sarcastic and biting. 

Darcy placed a hand on Tony’s shoulder, hoping to show her support. Darcy knew that Pepper wouldn’t request Tony’s presence if it was important. Pepper knew Tony better than anyone on the Avengers. She knew what made him tick and what didn’t. Still, Darcy wanted to yell at her. Tony had been stressed all week, and he was finally relaxing. 

“If you make it back alive, you’ve got dibs on a corner of my sofa, a bag of popcorn and movie of your choice.” She never let Tony choose the movie. 

Tony smiled. “You got it.” He took off his sunglasses and perched them on her nose. “See ya around, Darcy.”

Darcy wandered around the park for another hour, but the shine seemed to have vanished. Darcy cursed Tony for taking up so much of her life. He would be the death of her and she wouldn’t mind one bit. The only regret she’d have was of leaving him alone. Darcy glanced up at the sunlight breaking through the leaves and headed home. She didn’t feel like going on a walk. For some reason she missed the cold.

***

Darcy slipped into a pair of a ratty pair of pajama bottoms left by her ex-boyfriend and her dad’s fireman t-shirt. She put her hair into a high sloppy bun and then made sure that she had enough popcorn. She should have done it earlier, but she’d gotten distracted by Forever—Darcy’s new favorite show. She’d missed a few episodes and had to catch up. By the time she finished, she ate warmed up spaghetti and then changed. 

It was about time for Tony to show up. He texted twenty minutes ago saying he was on his way. She popped the back of kettle corn into the microwave and pushed one minute. The stupid microwave didn’t have a popcorn button. She really needed to talk to Tony about that. What kind of microwave didn’t have that awesome setting?

She dumped the popcorn into a silver bowl and sat on the sofa, surfing Netflix until the chime of the elevator signaled Tony’s arrival. His jacket was the first thing removed followed by his tie. Both ended up in a pile on the floor. His shoes were kicked off under the coffee table. 

Tony groaned as he stretched his legs out. “I think I died and then came back to life. I’m serious. I died of boredom. I don’t understand how Pepper can live through those horrible ordeals everyday. I’m so glad I made her CEO. Otherwise this company would be in the toilet.”

“Pepper will be thrilled to hear how much you appreciate her. You should send her a fruit basket,” Darcy added, amused at how adamant he was. 

“She hates fruit. I’ll send her a Starbucks gift card basket. They make those right?”

“Uh…” Darcy had no idea what he was talking about. She never drank that much coffee. 

Tony waved a negligent hand. “Eh, I’ll ask JARVIs to look into it for me.” He dove into the popcorn and shoveled it in his mouth. “So, any movie I want, huh?”

Darcy closed her eyes and asked for patience. She should have specified. Some of the movies he thought were golden, sucked. Seriously. She didn’t even know how they got the funding. “Yeah.” 

Tony cackled again and walked over to her collection of movies. He riffled through them, scoffing and oohing over the titles. “Sucks. Really sucks. No, no no. Okay. Not bad. Great movie. Nope. Couldn’t even watch it the first time. Sequel was terrible.” Tony paused when he read one of the titles. He yanked it and thrust it at her. “Why do you even have this movie?”

Darcy frowned. “Its brilliant. A masterpiece.”

“No it isn’t. I’m offended that you even own this movie.”

“Christian Bale is hot.” Darcy shrugged at his expression. What? She knew that Tony had a feud going on with Batman, but Batman Begins was an epic movie. “Just choose.”

“Fine. But we’re going to talk about this later. We need to discuss your weird Batman fixation.” Tony left the movie on the table as a reminder. “This one.” He put it in the DVD player without telling her the title or letting her see the case.

She resigned herself to watching Back to the Future or Godzilla. Both were gifts from Tony. He liked some of the cult classics. She laughed when the familiar theme music blared from the surround sound. “Clue?”

“My choice, remember?” He ate another handful of popcorn. “Now, shut up and watch.”

Darcy swung her legs onto the coffee table and leaned back into the numerous pillows. She snuggled into her blanket and laughed with Tony at the opening scene. Somehow near the end of the movie, she ended up with the bowl of popcorn on her lap and cuddled against Tony’s side. She hadn’t moved. Darcy bit her lip to stop the bright smile. 

Darcy nudged him when he didn’t move. The movie had ended ten minutes ago. And as much as she loved being cradled in his arms, she didn’t want it to go any further, yet. 

Tony protested with a moan. “I’m comfy. Go bother someone else.”

“Do you really want to spend the entire night on my couch?” Darcy asked, trying to pull away. Tony acted like an octopus and suctioned onto her as soon as she had one limb free. 

“I’ve slept on worse.”

“But you don’t have too. Your bed is only three floors below mine,” Darcy pointed out with a yawn. She wasn’t too worried about him. She’d seen him sleep on the floor in his lab, with Dum-E as a pillow. He could probably sleep anywhere.

“That would involve moving,” Tony reminded her. Darcy chuckled and extracted herself.

“Fine, but I’m going to bed.” He perked up. “Where you are not following. Couch, remember? You even have pillows and a blanket.”

Tony flopped round until he was comfortable enough. He made a small cocoon of pillows and wrapped the blanket completely around him. He looked like a burrito—a very expensive burrito.

Darcy almost skipped brushing her teeth to crash in bed, but forced herself into the bathroom when a piece of popcorn refused to dislodge from her teeth. It would annoy her all night. She blearily brushed and flossed her teeth, and ran her comb through her hair. Then she tumbled to bed, diving under the covers. She fell asleep minutes after closing her eyes.

***

Darcy woke with a wide yawn and a crick in her neck. She winced as she turned over. Why did the sun have to rise every day? She wanted to sleep in, but knew she needed to get up. Work. Work was terrible.

Darcy got dressed and stumbled into the kitchen. She peeked her head in the living room and grinned when she could only see Tony’s dark hair. Darcy grabbed a few eggs, milk, cheese from the fridge and an onion. Then she whipped up her famous, famous in her mind, scrambled eggs. Two large glasses of orange juice were next, while the coffee percolated in the machine.

Tony emerged from sleep like a meerkat. “Coffee?” Tony walked into the kitchen wrapped in her blanket and with the worst case of bed head she’d ever seen. He looked like a human Sonic the Hedgehog.

She held out a full mug with a teasing grin. “You can have it on one condition. What’s one plus two plus two plus one?”

Tony stared blankly until his brain caught up. “The first alternate ending.”

“Ding ding ding. Give the man a coffee.” Darcy watched in bemusement as he guzzled it like water. She still didn’t understand how he could do that. She drank hers slowly.

Darcy nudged him to the table where their breakfast was waiting. They ate and talked little, both still a little out of it. She put the dirty dishes in the sink. Her breath caught in her throat when she felt Tony come up behind her. 

“Have I told you lately, how amazing you are? Because you are.”

Darcy swallowed. She took a chance and leaned against his chest. When he didn’t pull away she leaned more weight against him. It would get uncomfortable soon with the arc reactor in the way, but it was okay for now. “Of course I am.” 

“And because I’m amazing, I think we should be fantastic together,” Tony continued after a few moments of silence.

Darcy fumbled the fork she washed, dropping it back in the sink. “A date.” It was a statement more than a question. 

“Yup.” He breathed in her scent and leaned closer. 

Darcy wondered if he could feel her racing heart. It was gonna burst out of her chest. This was ridiculous. She knew he flirted with her, but she’d never been absolutely certain that he wanted to take it anywhere. Last night helped since he wasn’t tactile with any of the other Avengers or even Pepper, but they were best friends. 

This was important. 

Darcy debated whether to keep the moment light when she mentally shook her head. She just needed to be herself. Darcy turned in his arms so she could see his face. “I don’t know. I’m supposed to be at work in less than thirty minutes.”

Tony started to smile. “So call in sick. Nasty flu. I hear your boss isn’t going to work today either.”

Darcy cocked an eyebrow at his response. He normally didn’t play hooky as much as everyone thought. “Sounds compelling. I’ll have to check my calendar to see when I’m free.”

“They still make those?” Tony asked.

Darcy laughed until her ribs hurt. “Yes, Tony. Oh, and would you look at that. Empty.” Darcy wrapped her arms around his waist.

“Hmm. I like the sound of that.” Tony continued to stare into her eyes. “Didn’t you say you’d teach me how to dance?”

Darcy blinked at the bizarre request. She never said that, but it wouldn’t stop her. Tony needed to let loose more often. Darcy turned on her iPod and chose a song she knew he wouldn’t loathe. 

Darcy pushed him away from her, and then taught him a few moves that she knew. They were all dumb or silly. They laughed and did them anyway. She loved that about Tony. He didn’t mind making a fool of himself for her. Darcy made up a few new moves and almost fell. She snorted when he caught her

“What are you doing?” He looked at her like she was crazy.

“I have no idea.”

“That’s how I normally feel,” Tony confessed. “There is one dance that I know. Learned it when I was a kid. Mom was obsessed with the stupid dance.” 

Darcy stumbled through the moves until she recognized a few steps as Swing. After a few more minutes of coaching Darcy got the hang of the basics. She never thought that they would be Swing dancing in her kitchen to the Goo Goo Dolls. 

“At least she taught you something good.” Darcy winced as soon as the words left her mouth. “That was—”

“No, that’s fair. It’s true. Didn’t learn much from Howard either.” 

Darcy refused to touch that subject. She knew how terrible Tony’s relationship was with his dad. He had nothing good to say about the man. 

“Just one.” Tony’s eyes shone with something Darcy couldn’t name. His hand resting on the small of her back pulled her against him. “I promise I’ll never give up on you or on us.”

Darcy felt like she’d been sucker punched in the stomach. Tears pricked her eyes. “I’ll always come back,” Darcy vowed. 

Darcy and Tony both learned a lot from their absent fathers. Howard Stark never gave up on Captain America, but he gave up on Tony. James Lewis promised to stay, but never returned home. They learned to never leave their loved ones behind. 

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on Tumblr if you’re interested.


End file.
